After two years of cancelled plans, constant uncertainty, relational isolation, and the very real fear of getting too close to people, we are feeling lonely. #amiright? We feel disconnected. We’re feeling distant from our friends. We’re both discouraged and lonely AND also too exhausted to make an effort or to be a good and initiating friend. Even though we now can gather as a church in large and small, formal and informal ways, community within our spiritual family is costly and tough.
Not only are most of us lonely right now, in many ways we are also experiencing another season of rejection. Or at least we’re experiencing the long-term effects of being rejected for two years. Even if we fully agreed with all of the social distancing, masking, and isolating, we still felt rejected. We experienced our friends shrinking back from us. We tried not to take it personal but in many cases others don’t want to be around us.
On top of what we’re all experienced, which has taken a toll on all of us, we’re also tempted to project this onto our Savior. Maybe Jesus also doesn’t want to be around me. Maybe Jesus also rejects me, shrinks back from me, and doesn’t want to be around me. But nothing could be further from the truth! Whether we feel it or not, whether we fully believe it or not, Jesus will never abandon his friends.
In his book Gentle and Lowly (my favorite book I read over the pandemic) pastor and author Dane Ortlund writes:
“Here is the promise of the gospel and the message of the whole Bible: In Jesus Christ, we are given a friend who will always enjoy rather than refuse our presence. This is a companion whose embrace of us does not strengthen or weaken depending on how clean or unclean, how attractive or revolting, how faithful or fickle, we presently are.”
Christian, when you think of Jesus do you only think of him as Savior, King, or Lord? He is fully and totally all of those. But he is also your friend. The King who rules the cosmos, the Savior who is fully God, the Lord who rightly should receive all humanity’s allegiance, that same Jesus is also your friend.
“This is my command: Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this: to lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants anymore, because a servant doesn’t know what his master is doing. I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from my Father. You did not choose me, but I chose you…” -Jesus in John 15:12-16 (CSB)
Saint, you have been chosen by Christ himself. He wanted you. He loves you. He died for you. He has made you his friend. He doesn’t call you servant but he calls you friend. Did you know that? Do you believe that? When you think of Jesus do you only think of him as your Lord? Do you only think of him as your King? Do you only see yourself as his servant? If so, that’s just part of your identity. You are also his FRIEND.
And what kind of friend is Jesus? Is he like my current friends who’re still cautious at times to come near me, shake my hand, or give me a hug? Is he like my former “friends” who left me, gossiped about me, ignored me, betrayed me, and/or abandoned me?
Unlike the world around us, Jesus will not abandon us if we mess up, fall apart, or even give up on life. Even when we have uncertainty in every area of our lives, there is one place we can have certainty, one place we can have confident hope, and that is in Christ's love and friendship.
Regardless on how this pandemic plays out, Jesus is a friend like you could never image. Jesus is a friend you’d never even dare hope would exist. He’s here for you right now. He knows you completely and fully and still choses you. Brother and sister, even at your worst, your sin isn’t too much to keep Jesus away from you. Remember that Jesus was known for being a friend of the broken, the oppressed, the marginalized, the evil, and the scum. His opponents tried to use that against him: “He’s a friend of tax collectors and sinner!” (Matt. 11:19). In case you didn’t know, that accusation backfired on his opponents and even more people flocked to Jesus.
Let this truth move from the screen you’re reading and into not just your head but into your heart. Don’t just know that Jesus befriends you, believe it and feel it. When you feel alone, believe and feel that he’s happily and gloriously there with you. When you feel abandoned, trust that Jesus will never abandon you. When you feel unloved or betrayed, receive that Jesus will never stop loving you nor will he ever betray you. Christian, this is who we are. We’re friends with our King and Savior Jesus Christ.
“Christ’s heart for us means that he will be our never-failing friend no matter what friends we do or do not enjoy on earth. He offers us a friendship that gets underneath the pain of our loneliness. While that pain does not go away, its sting is made fully bearable by the far deeper friendship of Jesus. He walks with us through every moment. He knows the pain of being betrayed by a friend, but he will never betray us. He will not even so much as COOLY welcome us. That is not who he is. That is not his heart.” -Dane Ortlund in Gentle and Lowly
SPENCER PETERSON / COMMUNITY LIFE PASTOR
*An earlier version of this blog was originally published in January of 2021 as “A Best Friend like No Other” on Hiawatha’s website.